A funny thing often happens when you start training, eating better and looking after yourself. You get that friend who tells you that “you’re obsessed” or the work colleague who says “stop being a bore just have a biscuit”.
This is dead common.
Friends and family will have questions and make some shitty and not so supportive comments. The main thing to keep in mind is that all your efforts to train and eat well are for YOU. There is no need to feel as if you are being “obsessive” or anything like that because of what other people say.
This reaction from your friends to you choosing to take care of yourself by making better choices typically comes from a place of insecurity on their part.
(Whether they consciously realise it or not)
If they can stop you from working on bettering yourself they will feel better about not taking action on those things themselves – when deep down they wish they could do what you’re doing.
Now, because we as humans generally want to avoid confrontation and want people to like us it can be very easy to not stand our ground and eat the crap food that is offered around the office for example.
‘Cos doing what we planned to do when friends and family are trying to convince you to do the opposite can be really hard but if you push through the discomfort and keep doing what you planned to do…
Keep eating well.
Keep tracking your food etc.
…then the dynamic will eventually start to change and the not so supportive comments will change to questions about how you’re managing to change so positively
“What’s your secret?”
“So tell me about this tracking thing”
“What is it that do you do in the gym again?”
People can often be resistant to other people making positive changes in their life because if highlights “flaws” of their own.
So they try to drag you down to feel better about themselves.
But by standing your ground and showing them the benefits of prioritising your health you’re potentially going to help THEM long term ‘cos they might just be inspired to make the switch too. Also, to help you deal with this in the moment here’s a really simple non-confrontational comeback that I learnt from my friend Adee…
You can’t be responsible for your friends/family’s reactions to your lifestyle, but you can choose how you respond. Something quick and polite like, “Right now I have specific goals I’m working towards and this is one tool that I’m using to achieve them” or “I appreciate your concern but I’m actually really happy with the way I’m eating.”
By flipping the tone into something positive, rather than responding defensively, shows them that they can’t drag you down.
Makes sense right?
It’s better for you and it’s better for them too.
We talk about this topic in depth on this week’s podcast.